Question
Does your partner neither see nor admit things you’ve tried to tell him/her to acknowledge that make your relationship too bad to stay in?
My answer
The author breaks this question down into four sub-sections:
1. Can he acknowledge his problem?
Only recently, my partner has acknowledged that he has a negative way of dealing with comments that I make in humour or a banter-like fashion. He blames this on the way his mum communicates in veiled criticisms.
2. Is he willing to change?
He's not so much willing to change as willing to be alerted to his reactions. However we have discussed this and he isn't sure that he can change, or that if I alter him to his reactions that he won't react in a defensive fashion.
3. Can you let go of being bothered by the problem?
No. This problem has been the basis of our relationship problems. The way that he's treated me has beaten me down, worn me out and demolished my self-esteem over time. I can't let this problem continue unless it's to my own detriment.
4. Is he able to change?
He's not sure. I personally think that this problem is something that's so ingrained into his personality that he won't be able to change.
Quick take
If your partner can't even see what it is about him that makes you want to get out, it's time to get out.
My prognosis
He has only very recently acknowledged this issue. I don't think that combined with the other problems that we have that I would be happy staying based on this question.
Does your partner neither see nor admit things you’ve tried to tell him/her to acknowledge that make your relationship too bad to stay in?
My answer
The author breaks this question down into four sub-sections:
1. Can he acknowledge his problem?
Only recently, my partner has acknowledged that he has a negative way of dealing with comments that I make in humour or a banter-like fashion. He blames this on the way his mum communicates in veiled criticisms.
2. Is he willing to change?
He's not so much willing to change as willing to be alerted to his reactions. However we have discussed this and he isn't sure that he can change, or that if I alter him to his reactions that he won't react in a defensive fashion.
3. Can you let go of being bothered by the problem?
No. This problem has been the basis of our relationship problems. The way that he's treated me has beaten me down, worn me out and demolished my self-esteem over time. I can't let this problem continue unless it's to my own detriment.
4. Is he able to change?
He's not sure. I personally think that this problem is something that's so ingrained into his personality that he won't be able to change.
Quick take
If your partner can't even see what it is about him that makes you want to get out, it's time to get out.
My prognosis
He has only very recently acknowledged this issue. I don't think that combined with the other problems that we have that I would be happy staying based on this question.
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